Art House

[Robusto]

Let's show each other our creations in one thread. I've made it a sticky so we get a collection going.

There's a few of us being creative in different ways. Why not shove stuff in here for brothers?

Drew - Shove your newest Pinch in here!

I'm not a precious arty git, but I like trying to write words and music. Here is a song lyric I'm working on. Music is coming along, too. It has a catchy title...


THESE SCONES COME WITH LOVE

People coming round
Is such a chore
I don't invite
But I am invited
So the potato peeling falls to me
And I don't like it
Because I'd rather sit and eat
From a plate on my lap
And watch shit TV
Than have an awkward chat

Now someone's knocked at the door
And invited us round
For aperitifs next Sunday evening
And we can't recall
The woman's name
But believe, after discussion,
That she's after someone
Who can chat in French
Like her husband did

This isn't strictly true as we have now found her
But the ideas have come together
Because of times her lad's joined mine
For a lift in my car to rural skateparks

I think I'm becoming others-phobic
Losing myself inside this laptop
Maybe I should smash the HomeHub
No - because other folk we know
Are about to arrive in ten minutes with a million snaps
Of their Christmas in California
To force-feed us over freshly baked scones
And I need a tunnel to find my way out
Otherwise there will be no possible form of escape

As I get older I really don't like to lose what time I have left

BJO 2008


Now add some of yours. :biggrin1:

[nicwing]

Let's show each other our creations in one thread. I've made it a sticky so we get a collection going.

There's a few of us being creative in different ways. Why not shove stuff in here for brothers?

Drew - Shove your newest Pinch in here!

I'm not a precious arty git, but I like trying to write words and music. Here is a song lyric I'm working on. Music is coming along, too. It has a catchy title...


THESE SCONES COME WITH LOVE

People coming round
Is such a chore
I don't invite
But I am invited
So the potato peeling falls to me
And I don't like it
Because I'd rather sit and eat
From a plate on my lap
And watch shit TV
Than have an awkward chat

Now someone's knocked at the door
And invited us round
For aperitifs next Sunday evening
And we can't recall
The woman's name
But believe, after discussion,
That she's after someone
Who can chat in French
Like her husband did

This isn't strictly true as we have now found her
But the ideas have come together
Because of times her lad's joined mine
For a lift in my car to rural skateparks

I think I'm becoming others-phobic
Losing myself inside this laptop
Maybe I should smash the HomeHub
No - because other folk we know
Are about to arrive in ten minutes with a million snaps
Of their Christmas in California
To force-feed us over freshly baked scones
And I need a tunnel to find my way out
Otherwise there will be no possible form of escape

As I get older I really don't like to lose what time I have left

BJO 2008


Now add some of yours. :biggrin1:


Nicely put Bryan, I find myself getting more cumgeonly as I get older, It's not that I don't want company, I just want to choose who and when, and I want to be able to enjoy my own company and that of real friends.

Thanks for putting this up, Salut mon frere!

[Drewmidorn]

You should finish that as a song bryan and post an mp3.

I'm afraid my artistic offerings are either flippant, dirty, dark or outrageous pop!lol and I've posted more links than vanity should dictate, so I'll wait in eagerness for everyones offerings. I'd like to suggest a limerick/poetry/lyric/sonnet/ode writing attempt to the royal weed tobacco in its finest form (the cigar obviously) for everyone!?

D

[Drewmidorn]

PS... I find living on my own and having good company when I want it, but not when I don't a perfect balance! The only people invited here are the people I want to see. lol

[Mr Moore]

There was a nice chap from chester,
who gave me a go of his vespa,
I blasted the throttle,
then lost my bottle,
so I told him, I waz jus givin it a testa.

[linfield100]

I'll try and dig out some stuff I wrote years ago before I realised poetry dosn't pay anything, and a lot of it is rubbish any way.
Here's a quick bit of foolishness. Spike Milligan was brilliant at it.

There was a young man down in Kent
Who folk wondered just what he meant
When he said that he's off
For a puff and a cough
As long as his Robusto wasn't bent.

Tony

[Robusto]

Two clips of the band I play in in Kent called EK1.
And one clip of me mucking about at home in Bb looking depressed.
(I get to smoke cigars in that room when she's out).

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[Stogiedog]

Bryan nice one.:tongue: I envy your ability to make music my man!!!!!!!!!!!

:cowboyic9:

[Boss Hog]

[quote=Robusto;10067]Two clips of the band I play in in Kent called EK1.
And one clip of me mucking about at home in Bb looking depressed.
(I get to smoke cigars in that room when she's out).

<object width="425" height="344">
Sounds like a good band, you certainly know how to tinkle those ivories,

Broadstairs bandstand with Bleak House in the background, Fantastic!! love the place, brings back many happy memories.</object>

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[Robusto]

Do you know it then, Boss?
Broadstairs IMHO is the nicest town around here, and has loads of places to play live.
One of the kids I teach lives in Bleak House!

[Boss Hog]

Do you know it then, Boss?
Broadstairs IMHO is the nicest town around here, and has loads of places to play live.
One of the kids I teach lives in Bleak House!


I lived in Broadstairs many years ago not far from the old dumpton greyhound track (long before they pulled it down) and have family all over Thanet. Yes, Broadstairs is lovely and has never lost it's character over the years, I always enjoy a walk and a smoke down victoria parade and Harbour street with a cake or an italian ice at Chiapiannis. Unlike Ramsgate which I am also fond of has not been the same for me since they knocked Pleasurama down.

[Robusto]

Small world, Boss! We play a couple of gigs a year in the garden of the Racing Greyhound at Dumpton. They go mental and dance on the tables! I don't rate Ramsgate either...

[nicwing]

I feel a summer Kent Herf might be on the cards, what more could you want, The Viceroy tinkling the ivories, Ice cream, a good stogie, a light drizzle and a force 7 easterly.

Post some dates of your Broadstairs gigs Robo and we'll certainly be there!

[Robusto]

Will do, Sir. :biggrin1:

http://ek1band.co.uk/Gigs.htm

[Stogiedog]

Nic / Bryan

The Dawg is defo in for the Kent herf meet!!!!!!!!!!!:rock:
:cowboyic9:

[Deano]

Ok everyone's gone off topic, as usual, back on topic:


Do you think I'm ignorant of your music,
Do you think I cannot hear the notes you lean to

What David played may please the lord,
but I am not he
Nor do I lend towards his narcissistic needs

My faith is lost, you love your music most
I cannot hear the notes you adhere

Angelic Rhapsody will not meet me,
as dark angels do damn all I see
Oh Gabriel why do you haunt me

Wondering repetition following the crowd,
But my making cannot be undone for peers,
Despite his godlessness

Rhymythic passion of primeval,
cannot understand the love of notes
That I have despite the ignorance of you

Angelic Rhapsody will not meet me,
as dark angels do damn all I see
Oh Gabriel why do you haunt me

You announce no more.

[Mr Moore]

Art is the tree of life. Science is the tree of death.
Not mine, William Blake.

[Mr Moore]

Quote "What David played may please the lord," Un-Quote
David ?
who deano.

[Deano]

Ok so that's a reference to Leonard Cohen's (and the late Jeff Buckley) Hallelujah, which in turn alludes to David's harp-playing used to soothe King Saul within the Bible....

[TJCoro]

Senor Deano,

Are you a traffic cop?:noidea:

If not, you should be. You'd make a great one!:secruity:

:bandit: Names TJ, TJCoro, and I guess every fourm has one.

[Deano]

Shut it Coro :p

:cowboyic9: Names Deano, Deano Deano, and he likes telling TJCoro to shut it:smoke:

[Robusto]

Lyrics for a Country song.
It's about Country girls, heat and sex.

DOWN WHERE THE DROVEWAY TURNS TO ASHES

Carlene's popping midget pills
Down where the droveway turns to ashes
She sighs a tired moist apples-tight chest
And leans back with some barley grass in her mouth

She wears cowboy cheque tops
And white trousers from the mall
She drinks her soda by licking out
The corner of her mouth at each freezing shot

She's turning like a Siamese pussy
From left to centre to right with a grind
Her sighs come haunting over the side of the pick-up
As she runs her thumbs through my Brylcream


This is the night we sleep by the lake
Chasing fur fast and milling bone and flesh pummel-hard
This is the night the milk flows freely
Milk-burst on a here there and wherever
(It gets everywhere)


This is the night we free desire
We desire to be free, higher
Hire me a blanket by an orange fire
Blot it out with fat black shadows


Of body towers and chest hills and pelvic fountains
Covered by grass and each other's palms
Making firm movements to frighten moles to death
Making sounds of fire sparks


Sparking flames in mirrored Siamese pussy eyes
Sparking flames in mirrored Siamese pussy eyes

BJO Jan 09


http://img2.timeinc.net/people/i/2005/specials/beauties05/remakespoll/jsimpson.jpg


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[rokkitsci]

Love the lyrics, Robusto!

Sensual, descriptive, emotive.

Only, but... what the hell is a "droveway?" Is that a driveway that someone pilfered?

[Deano]

Good stuff, but I recommend you bang one off before writing again hehe

[Boss Hog]

Lyrics for a Country song.
It's about Country girls, heat and sex.



http://img2.timeinc.net/people/i/2005/specials/beauties05/remakespoll/jsimpson.jpg


<hr size="1">

Blimey!
Moist apples, Milk bursting everywhere, Siamese pussy & Daisy Duke(s). I can see the inspiration and where the apples idea came from, although I would have used "abandoned puppies fighting within the softness of a pillowcase"
All it needs is "a pickup truck, a dusty highway" and you'll have Willie Nelson banging your door down.

Cracking stuff. Spot on Deano.

:smoke:

[Robusto]

Marvin Gaye never recorded a vocal unless he'd flown into a bishop's rage.

[nicwing]

Bryan's a method lyricist.

Please can we have more daisy duke pictures!

[Stevieboy]

Good stuff, but I recommend you bang one off before writing again hehe
ROFLMAO!!! GENIUS!!

[Robusto]

SEEMINGLY ENDLESS SCREEN REPEAT

would you rub shoulders
with a psycho in a bar
in a car park or a lift-shaft
or a poundland
would you tell your life
to a cokehead on a train
in a churchyard or a coach
in an arboretum
would you reveal all
to a fascinating gal
with your image on her tee shirt
dancing there always
would you large it up
with a cv made of charcoal
a back story from a publicist's wet dream
on seemingly endless screen repeat

would you read a letter
to a nutcase in a shop
on a Virgin 777
or by a car wash
would you type your pain
to a florist in your town
a lute maker or guide
on a pier
would you confess all
to a vicar in a cassock
by a scratching font
over a bald kiddie's head
would you make it up
on a brain trainer screen
on the back seat of a car
on seemingly endless screen repeat


BJO Jan09

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[Robusto]

Ballad Of The Lock Jaw Stogie

Sometimes when the day seems long
I take a stick that's good and strong
And sulfurize the foot all hot and grey
I blow the end in little circles
Suck it strong and see those turtle
Heads that stopped me having fun today

The old man driver braking harshly
Dodgy tractor full of parsley
Sage Rosemary and Thyme are in the back
Bobbing up and down and waving
Watching my cigar that's shaking
Up their high-pitched vocals for some craic

And as I toke my lights start shining
Praise The Lord for Cuban cutting
Dark tobacco snipped in little domes
Sexy whiff of stogie climbing
Up my nostrils deep inside me
Up again into the clouds alone

So sing your songs to Jesus sweetly
Montecristo Nub Cohiba
Bolivar Partagas Praise The Lord
Smoke the smoke that takes you daily
Past the drudge and tosh completely
Fly the clouds above Havana Road

I know sticks that make you horny
I know sticks that sleep you soundly
Smoke your stogie slowly over hours
No Castellas, no tinned Hamlets
Panamas or Cafe Creme-lettes
Ride a stick that takes you to the stars

Smoke on mountains, smoke in churchyards
Smoke at stations, supermarkets
Pubs and clubs and brothels if you wish
Puff on benches, puff on buses
Blow it out and drop the ashes
On the ground or in a petrie dish

Smoke on while you're double-glazing
Spreading shingle, soixante-neufing
Though you might get lockjaw with the latter
Puff away to Jackson Browne
Lorna Luft or Elton John
(Yes - Elton loved Malc Allison's stogie patter)

And when you tot up pros and cons
Remember that you can't go wrong
With smoking as another love affair
Leave the bottle and don't get pissed
Never take one off the wrist
Cigars are hot so blow them out to share!


BJO 06.04.09

[Drewmidorn]

I am currently recording karaoke tracks for a big karaoke company. Girls Aloud, Estelle, Katy Perry, The Pussycat Dolls and Rianna.

There is no Art in this studio this week.

If any of you had even the slightest compassion for me you'd kill me!

(I'm not actually genuinely inviting attempts on my life, I know what "internet folk" can be like, its all metaphorical!)

D

[Stevieboy]

I am currently recording karaoke tracks for a big karaoke company. Girls Aloud, Estelle, Katy Perry, The Pussycat Dolls and Rianna.

There is no Art in this studio this week.

If any of you had even the slightest compassion for me you'd kill me!

(I'm not actually genuinely inviting attempts on my life, I know what "internet folk" can be like, its all metaphorical!)

D

Drew - you poor, poor bastard!! You must be going :der:

Sorry dude :(

[Boss Hog]

Ballad Of The Lock Jaw Stogie


BJO 06.04.09




Good stuff, Looks like you took Deano's advice!

:smile:

[Robusto]

It is good to listen to the young.

[Robusto]

I am currently recording karaoke tracks for a big karaoke company. Girls Aloud, Estelle, Katy Perry, The Pussycat Dolls and Rianna.

There is no Art in this studio this week.

If any of you had even the slightest compassion for me you'd kill me!

(I'm not actually genuinely inviting attempts on my life, I know what "internet folk" can be like, its all metaphorical!)

D

I might cut and paste a scenario brewing elsewhere between musos. Death threats not far away...

[cj121]

The Mighty Robusto strikes gold again with the Ballard of the Lockjaw Stogie:hail:

Top stuff matey, you're wasted in formality, you're a pedagogical masterpiece. You enjoy your time away from the hum and the drum my man:smoke:

[cj121]

Is it purely a lyrical sticky this Bryan, or can other contributions be lobbed in? I haven't anything specific in mind, but I might get the juices warmed up.

[Robusto]

Free swim for all, cj.

Place for all our gorgeous High Art hosedowns to be posted so they stay in the same place on the forum. Otherwise they seem to get lost.

Just an idea, like... Not meant to be precious...

Music, Dance and Drama.
Whatever. :smoke:


Cake icing for the gifted and talented avatars is OK.

[Boss Hog]

Free swim for all, cj.

Place for all our gorgeous High Art hosedowns to be posted so they stay in the same place on the forum. Otherwise they seem to get lost.

Just an idea, like... Not meant to be precious...

Music, Dance and Drama.
Whatever. :smoke:


Cake icing for the gifted and talented avatars is OK.

You really want cake icing?? I can do that!

[Robusto]

You need to cook for all of us, Boss!

I've just been sent a DVD that a mate and I were asked to write some music for several years ago. We were asked to write for a documentary about the SRN4 Hovercraft that criss-crossed the English Channel close to my house between Dover and Calais, Ramsgate and Boulogne (I think), for many years. The craft is de-commissioned now so this DVD is being marketed at aficionados, anoraks and the hundreds of people who have worked in and around Dover Docks over the years.

If I said it's not the sexiest of subjects, I'm sure you'd get it. However it was a specific commission and it is great to see our Art lol matched to massive hovercrafts ploughing in and out of Dover Docks. Nice to see the end product, and the action shots are great.

I'll try and get a clip whipped off the disc quietly when I can get near the software. It's great to hear something that was recorded carefully as opposed to the usual live sound put out by the band.

http://www.jameshovercraft.co.uk/hover/images/craft/srn4/hoverspeed/srn4_pmargcoaches.jpg

[Boss Hog]

You need to cook for all of us, Boss!

I've just been sent a DVD that a mate and I were asked to write some music for several years ago. We were asked to write for a documentary about the SRN4 Hovercraft that criss-crossed the English Channel close to my house between Dover and Calais, Ramsgate and Boulogne (I think), for many years. The craft is de-commissioned now so this DVD is being marketed at aficionados, anoraks and the hundreds of people who have worked in and around Dover Docks over the years.

If I said it's not the sexiest of subjects, I'm sure you'd get it. However it was a specific commission and it is great to see our Art lol matched to massive hovercrafts ploughing in and out of Dover Docks. Nice to see the end product, and the action shots are great.

I'll try and get a clip whipped off the disc quietly when I can get near the software. It's great to hear something that was recorded carefully as opposed to the usual live sound put out by the band.



Blimey, Hoverspeed! Not heard that in many years since my mother worked for them out of Ramsgate harbour as hoverlloyd and later from pegwell bay as hoverspeed. I can still remember covering my ears as one went out of the harbour while I drank my milkshake from the eagle cafe at the end of the harbour. Happy days on which I shall contemplate on at the end of the day with large one.

[Drewmidorn]

I hope that usage is covered by the original contract Bryan! If not i'd be skinning them alive! lol

Ahhhhh! Dover.... is it still the home of the Pykeys?

D

[Robusto]

It's gorgeous round here as you know, Drew. And Boss. :biggrin1:

Drew - That's what I thought about contracts and stuff. It's cheeky, I know, but for a teacher boy who escapes via music, it's nice to have something tangible to show. I doubt it will sell by the bucketload lol.

They spelt my name Brian on the credits which I find a pain when it counts.

The second segment sounds better than the first on this clip I've found. It sounds thin on here - and dated - but I'm not ashamed. :cowboyic9:

Drew - If you lived closer, I'd pop round and wig out in a muso way, mate.

At least the StogieDAWG can drive down the road and come round for a smoke. He did this evening and spent the evening on my smoking sofa. We both smoked a couple of prime ones off each. :smoke:

CLIP HERE (http://www.srn4.co.uk/trail_page.shtml)

[Drewmidorn]

Bryan if you're ever up Midlands way you're more than welcome to come over anytime.

[Robusto]

Thank you, Sir. I pass your way now and again when en route to Buxton so may well take you up on that some time down the line. You are welcome to drop by here if ever you are in Cross-Channel mode if you wish to listen out for the ghosts of hovercrafts and knock back some brown. :cowboyic9:

[Mr Moore]

listen out for the ghosts of hovercrafts and knock back some brown. :cowboyic9:

Nice line, although Im slightly preturbed as to the the meaning of "knock back some brown"

Im having visions of you and drew slouching on an old black leather sofa in an unlit murky smack den, a scratched up album of captain beefheart on repeat in the background, burnt strips of foil, greasy needles and old rizzla packets strewn all over floor..
Whilst you sit there, saying nothing, just "knocking back the brown"


Apologies in advance for painting such a bleak picture.

Although I must add there is an element of truth to this bleak tale, the smack den and the black sofa do exist !

Sorry Robusto, had to get that one in there.

[Robusto]

Just as I imagined it, MM.
I'm glad you are a colour code cracker. :hail:



:D:D:D Captain Beefheart lol

[Boss Hog]

Nice line, although Im slightly preturbed as to the the meaning of "knock back some brown"

Im having visions of you and drew slouching on an old black leather sofa in an unlit murky smack den, a scratched up album of captain beefheart on repeat in the background, burnt strips of foil, greasy needles and old rizzla packets strewn all over floor..
Whilst you sit there, saying nothing, just "knocking back the brown"
.

one drop of rhyhipnol later and it's fade to black for 4 hours by which time you end in lipstick and a maids costume spread out on the sofa with a robusto at each end!

[Drewmidorn]

one drop of rhyhipnol later and it's fade to black for 4 hours by which time you end in lipstick and a maids costume spread out on the sofa with a robusto at each end!

I'm a full time musician! I regular miss out a week at a time and then wake up in that state.

D