Help Me!

[rokkitsci]

I have too many "things" going.

Today in the post, I received a lurvely little Por Larra?aga box which contained 6 unbanded approx. 150mm x 43 or 44 ring gauge, well-formed see-gars. The outer package contained NO identifying information whatsoever regarding the sender other than having originated from Link into Learning, Falmouth, Cornwall.

WHO ARE YOU AND WHAT HAVE YOU SENT ME?!!

I gots enough problems keeping track of "stuff." Why must you torment me?

HELP!

[saggel]

hm... who is the sneaky bomber?

[G-man]

Hit him when he's down

hm... who is the sneaky bomber?

While you got him down give a couple a three good kicks for me LMAO
The Rocket Man begging , unheard of.

[daverave999]

Brilliant! How much more anonymous can you get?

[Simon-JG-hr]

Falmouth... that's just down the coast from me. There's not map entry... Some good old fashioned leg-work's required to solve this one... Do you want me to go down there and do a bit of snooping for you Rokkit? (Any excuse to charter a boat for a couple of days, given that I don't drive).

[tippexx]

You know what it is Si .... it's stuff left over from that last shipwreak. The local weren't about to smoke 'em .... so, they sent 'em to Rokkit!

[moidoid]

Well obviously I have no idea who it could be, but whoever it is must be a real aficionado of cigars

[rokkitsci]

Okay, okay

Mystery bomber, whoever you may be, stay anonymous. Fine. No problem.

But at least have the decency to tell me WTF it is that you sent me!

Lissen, here's the deal: You post up what them purty stogies is and I promise -- cross my heart and hope to die -- not to look at your nick so's you can remain incognito.

Fair dinkum?

[G-man]

Sure and our user name would't appear

Mystery bomber, whoever you may be, stay anonymous. Fine. No problem.

But at least have the decency to tell me WTF it is that you sent me!

Lissen, here's the deal: You post up what them purty stogies is and I promise -- cross my heart and hope YOU die -- not to look at your nick so's you can remain incognito.

Fair dinkum?

So they post the sticks and their user name along with it
Rocket Boy you'll have to get up pretty early to out fox a fox

[moidoid]

Well obviously I have no idea who it could be, but whoever it is must be a real aficionado of cigars

[El Catador]

Well obviously I have no idea who it could be, but whoever it is must be a real aficionado of cigars

Way too subtle!!!

You forget these NASA trained Rokkit fellas ain't employed on account o' there uncanny abilities to 'figure stuff out!'

[cj121]

Well obviously I have no idea who it could be, but whoever it is must be a real aficionado of cigars

There can't be many hailing from down that way ay?

[Boss Hog]

Isnt that the beauty of the postal service, especially ours. You just dont know what your going to get or when your going to get it and by who.

I'd be happy I got something, could have worse and been a box of brown stuff.

[rokkitsci]

BUSTED!

Muahahahahahahahahahaha!

Did you think to deceive me for long, anonymous bomber?

Did you think that just because after we launch the last of our 4 Shuttles in September or October and The Kennedy Space Center becomes the Kennedy Campground and RV Parking Center that we have forgone all of our Super-Sekrit NASA spy technology?

Did you not think we could turn our Sooper-Sekrit Spy Satellite and Combination Scone Defroster towards Falmouth, Cornwall and espy all who the Link into Learning to and fro?

Did you not realize that our level of resolution and our facial recognition technology can determine from which area of the groin a flea's pubic hair originated?

We are, after all, the scientifical and spacey agency of the World's Master Race! Wir sind ?ber alles!

However, notwithstanding our ability to destroy the Earth several times over, we also have access to Google, and a quick query on Link into Learning lead us to "Contact: " (...wait for it...), none other than our very own.... ANDY!

So, my surreptitious stogiebomber, now that you've been "outed," as it were, would you mind stepping over here to this large floor drain so I can attach these battery terminal clips to your bollocks and ask you just one question?

Good. Very good.

Why me? What have I ever done to you to incur such a sneaky, unscrupulous act? Are you trying to re-ignite the hostilities that put us at each other's throats during the War to End All War? No, wait. That was the Jerry's, wudn't it? Jerry, Limey... I always get those confused. Never mind.

Second question... okay, okay nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition... remember, you must beat the buzzer to avoid testicular torture: WTF are those stoogies that you sent me? No fair removing the bands. Not sporting, you know. Bad show. Sticky wicket and all that rot.

You have just 30 seconds to reply before we turn on the cold water spray and complete the circuit to the battery.

29... 28... 27... 26...

I received a lurvely little Por Larra?aga box which contained 6 unbanded approx. 150mm x 43 or 44 ring gauge, well-formed see-gars. The outer package contained NO identifying information whatsoever regarding the sender other than having originated from Link into Learning, Falmouth, Cornwall.

WHO ARE YOU AND WHAT HAVE YOU SENT ME?!!

I gots enough problems keeping track of "stuff." Why must you torment me?

HELP!

[moppy]

Well well atleast one half of the mystery is solved! This is like one of those daytime detective shows :P